


Words I Couldn't Say

by rane_ab



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, M/M, Muteness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-04
Updated: 2012-06-04
Packaged: 2017-11-06 19:34:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/422439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rane_ab/pseuds/rane_ab
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Merlin's story is slightly different, but they're still two sides of the same coin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Words I Couldn't Say

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the interpretive dance challenge at the 2009 [Summer Pornathon](http://summerpornathon.livejournal.com), and in which there is no actual dancing.

The words are stolen from his mouth while his mother’s protectively curled around him in his sleep. They hang ragged and bloody from a sharp, inhuman nail, _drip, drip, drip_ onto the floor.

He doesn’t scream.

~

The sounds refuse to come, scratchy nothingness crawling up his throat. He moves his hands in rapid patterns, but no one understands. 

Everything builds up under his skin, until he is brimming with every emotion, until his small body can no longer hold them; they burst from him in violent tendrils that shake up the entire house.

~

When Merlin is angry, the pots clang in an aggressive beat, like a warning bell sounded for the world to hear. When he’s nervous, the herb jar shuffles around in a restless rhythm; when he gets excited, the chairs dance around the room. 

Sometimes, a lone carrot twirls quietly over Merlin’s head.

~

Hunith thinks there’s meaning to the shape of the shards on the floor; there has to be. She tries to read them, tries to read _him_. When she fails, she finally makes Merlin clean up his own mess, turning her face away.

~

One night, when Merlin was no more than a quiet little bump in Hunith’s belly, something broke into the house, whispering words into Hunith’s dreams: _Camelot_ , _destiny_ and _two sides of one coin_. 

Hunith tries to forget them still, as she watches people watching Merlin. Oh, they are friendly enough, but whispers follow them as they retreat, smiling. 

~

Hunith just wants Merlin to be happy.

~

When Merlin first meets Arthur, he claps his hands to attract attention, frowns at the display of arrogance. Arthur approaches him, taunts him, and Merlin can’t control his magic. 

Though all anyone can see is Merlin’s fist connecting with Arthur’s jaw.

~

‘Oh, thank God, I thought you were deaf as well as dumb!’ is what Arthur tells him on their second meeting; Merlin yanks off his jacket and glares. He loses, but only because of the way Gaius’ eyebrows dance over his face.

~

The Great Dragon tells him it can read his mind, then promptly ignores every single one of Merlin’s protests.

Sometimes, Merlin really hates his life.

~

Arthur seems to think bullying a manservant who can’t talk back is going to be easy. But Merlin scowls and gestures like the best of them, and doesn’t hesitate to pour dirt into Arthur’s food to get a point across. 

If things occasionally fall on Arthur’s head when he’s being an ass, well, Merlin can’t be blamed for other people’s shoddy workmanship.

~

After a whole year, Arthur reads Merlin’s hands better than he would anyone’s mouth, and Merlin doesn’t use them to insult quite that often anymore.

To be fair, that’s not saying much.

When those hands linger a bit too long after peeling clothes off Arthur’s skin, Arthur just blinks, and stares at them.

~

‘You’re strange,’ Arthur keeps telling Merlin. As time passes, though, Merlin begins to hear, just a little, ‘You’re mine.’

~

Merlin gives himself away the day a knife is pressed to Arthur’s throat before anyone can even react. Panic seizes him; every piece of crockery in the room swirls around in a disturbing, excited dance.

They knock out the attacker (and a few others), and Merlin tries very hard to look innocent, but a stray bit of parchment that folded itself into a dragon flies mockingly around his head.

~

Uther tries to behead him, to drown him, then burn him at the stake. By the time they try to hang him, Merlin’s making the ropes dance just to entertain the children in the front row. When he sees Arthur, they still for a moment, then perform a pirouette as Arthur’s fists relax by his sides, relieved.

~

Three years in exile change Merlin, but not as much as twenty years spent at Arthur’s side. He doesn’t rein in his magic anymore, lets the cutlery spell out his anger, his robes billow with excitement, Arthur’s throne shine with his pride. Lets his fingers trace Arthur’s face, where they whisper ‘I lo- ’ before Arthur kisses the words away.

~

When Arthur dies, a tree in the middle of the forest shakes all the way to its roots, making the ground tremble and the plants sway in a rhythm that says, ‘I will find you. I will.’

~

Centuries later, a young man sleeps when someone breaks into his house. Lips are pressed to his, speaking words without sound, and to the left, a lamp boogies off the table in sheer joy.


End file.
